Grateful that I can laugh at myself via /r/gratitude

Today I woke up and did my usual thing, and while doing it I’ll think of all of the things that I’m grateful for and decide which one I’m going to make a post about. Some days I don’t put much thought into it and just make the post and tell myself that it’s not about who reads it or how many comments I get or likes or any of that stuff. But today, as I was going through the list of things I could post about – i would think of one and then I’d remember “ oh I already posted about that one a few weeks ago” and then I’d move on to the next thing. And then I’d think “oh no, a toothpick holder isn’t going to be good enough, I can think of something better” and on and on, you know? I thought “I could just post about how great it is to have so much to be grateful for that I can’t really narrow it down to one thing! But, no, I already posted about that” this went on for a while and then it dawned on me just how full of sh!t I really am. I’ve made posts about being grateful that I’ve gained weight, but I’m still trying to lose it. I’ve made posts about how I love that i don’t have to feel rushed but every day I find ways to rush myself. Posted the other day about how grateful I am that I can post about being grateful for the same things more than once and here I am wrestling with finding something new to post about. I’ve made posts about being grateful that I enjoy being alone but I still feel lonely. Posted about being grateful that I don’t care what other people think and here I am trying to post things that will cause people to comment so I feel like I’m good enough to be here. There’s so much more. But I think it’s ok to be full of sh!t some days. It’s not like I’m NOT grateful for all of those things, I really am… I don’t know what I’m really trying to say accept maybe that I’m grateful that I’m a work in progress. I’m grateful I still care what people think to a certain extent but not enough to stop me from being vulnerable cuz that is something that everyone here identifies with. I’m grateful I still look forward to when people comment on my posts because I get to feel like I’m not alone and I’m good enough even though I know I’m not alone and I know I’m good enough. I guess it’s just nice to feel that connection. I’m still laughing at myself right now even as I type this up and go back and reword this and that so that it sounds better…. I’m going to hit POST and just get back to my routine. Love y’all!!