Grateful that Im learning to set boundaries and be more selfish via /r/gratitude

Nearly all of my life, i have let people who I want to love me absolutely stomp all over me and break every boundary.

I escaped an abusive relationship of 2.5 years this February 2025, and since have greatly reflected my actions and behaviors during this relationship in therapy. I realized that I had absolutely zero boundaries with my ex, and then later realized that it was how i grew up. . I was always doing everything and anything i could for the my family/partners, even if it hurt me or tormented me.

As for being selfish, I know that i deserve better. I deserve a loving, stable, reciprocal, and uplifting partner/family. I do deserve love and affection, even without tearing down my boundaries. I dont have to earn these things, i am acceptable and loveable and enough as I am.

I started to practice boundary setting since this breakup, and I cant see myself ever turning back. Nothing but protection and healing has come from this. Im grateful I was able to recognize this at such a young age. Im preventing myself from being a perpetual victim.